Caterpillar (General)

Animals reflect our behaviour. The animals that we feel a closeness to, encounter often, engage with, attract, and so on; have a role to play in that moment of our lives. They offer an understanding to us of the ‘play’ that is our current experience, and give insight into the intricacies of our lives. Following is the understanding for the troubled Caterpillar.

Caterpillar (General)   (Listen while you read)

CaterpillarAnger.  Trouble. Don’t mess with me. (Inner anger and disturbances, which need evaluation and releasing.)

 (What; just go away. As if I haven’t enough on my mind. Trouble, trouble, trouble. That’s all I get… Trouble, trouble, trouble…….. Just Go Away….………..

God, won’t they just leave me alone for a day. Not even a day; it’s just trouble, trouble, trouble…… God, I’m sick of it…………. (A long pause with a very deep sigh.)

I’m just so overloaded. … … … (Another deep sigh.) 

God; I’m just so overloaded. (Another deep sigh.)

Boy oh boy (whilst sighing) just can’t take this anymore……. (Another deep sigh.)

It’s just all way too much (whilst sighing).

If this continues on I don’t think I’ll make it…. I just don’t think I’ll make it…. Wow… (Another deep sigh.) Wow……. Just need some peace….. Just a little peace……… Just need to know that this will all be over with some day…. Need to know that life isn’t meant to be this haaaarrrrrrrrrrddddddddd……. (Another deep sigh.) Glory, glory, glory; will it ever end…….?

Well, my dear, dear friends…… I am aware of the depths to which we can reach….. And this reflection has certainly gone as deep as I would ever like to go….. I have been there personally; many years ago.

I remember trying to end my life a few times; life was ‘that’ hard; indeed it was. I didn’t succeed, as you know).   However, I really wanted to go away from all the darkness; all the inner turmoil; all the hatred, poverty, lies, bad behaviour.

Oh yes, my friends; I know this feeling all too well; I’m sad to say. However, I have a feeling that, just as did happen to me; there is a brighter day coming… we just have to hold on to see……….)

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Please don’t hesitate to contact one of the many organisations whose purpose is to assist you with ‘any’ mental anguish you may be suffering. Two such organisations are listed below. We care about you and want you to seek the help that will start you on your way to recovery.                                 

 Beyond Blue  Within Australia can be contacted by calling 1300 22 4636 .

Suicide Hotlines  Us & International.. A Depression & Mental Health Initiative where you can pose a question online. 1800 784 2433 (more numbers are available on site). 

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 © Carolyn Page – ABC of Spirit Talk

6 comments

  1. I too relate to this feeling of despair. As a child I didn’t want to be here and as a teen I tried to numb the hurt. Now, as an adult it seems that life is worth the effort. Phew!

    1. Oh wow, neighaway; it was a very hard reflection to do; I was reminded of how very difficult life was for many years…. Certainly glad that’s behind me. My heart goes out to those who feel this way today… My hope for them is that they, like me, have the strength to know that ‘everything’ passes; with time. (Of course, it’s difficult and we need a lot of support, one way or the other). This awful phase of my life started me on a quest for ‘something better’…. A long story and one meant for another day, however, I do hope that those who can identify with this reflection have the strength to go in search of anyone, anything that can assist them to ‘know’ that this doesn’t have to be the end…. Life can and will be better, providing we ‘want’ it to be and have the courage to make it happen…. This subject needs so much more than can be given in this comment section. Perhaps, should I be inspired, I’ll look into a write-up about this subject by other authors, or myself (as I say; if so inspired).
      Glad to hear that you too ‘made it through’…. well done..

      1. Yes, my heart also goes out to those that are in the struggles of life. I do hope others write about this topic. I would have given the world when I was going through poo to know even just one person may understand.

        1. Your comment has done just that… We oftentimes feel ‘so alone’ when we are struggling with ‘issues’. Your comment has highlighted the fact that we are not alone. Millions go through the struggle that you and I have; generally in the misconception that they are the ‘only’ one and that no one else could possibly understand their personal plight. I would disagree with that; pain is pain is pain is pain. It doesn’t really matter the cause of the pain. Pain is pain whether it is caused by a mother’s love for a still born babe or a child’s need to feel loved and protected. It matters little the cause; it is the pain that we can all feel and understand. Thank you for opening up this topic… it is my belief that we need to open the door on our internal pain. Should we not do this it sits and festers and harms and destroys our internal structure; our joy; our love; our very being. We must do all that we can to ensure that we treat this insidious falsity before it has the power to stifle our true natures…. Oh, life is far too precious to be lost to pain, falsity and despair….

    1. Yeah; they’re pretty cute… And they will eventually blossom into beautiful butterflies if they can just ‘hang around’ long enough to get through all the ‘tough times’ that seem to beset we humans…. 😉

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